​In his so-called “Liberation speech”, President Trump imposed a 10% tariff on imports from uninhabited territories, including Australia’s Heard and McDonald islands — remote outposts with no permanent human habitation, populated mainly by penguins and seals. Trump’s actions reflect a romantic crusade against imaginary trade villains, fully aligned with his “Make America Great Again” (Maga) philosophy, which continues to thrive on post-truth narratives.

I joined the chorus, standing by my principled view that all South AfriCANs, whites included, must help rebuild this country. After all, I’m a poster child of non-racialism

This latest memo, grandly titled the Washington Memorandum, is the handiwork of a group of Afrikaners plying their anti-South African trade/tirade under the banner of the Solidarity Movement — a club of ultra-right-wing crusaders led by AfriForum and Solidarity.

Leading the delegation to the US were AfriForum CEO Kallie Kriel, Solidarity’s chairperson Flip Buys, Dr Dirk Hermann and Jaco Kleynhans — four men on a mission to rewrite history, whitewash privilege, and beg King Trump for a pat on the head. The only “humanitarian crisis” here is that some want to have their apartheid cake and eat it too.

But now, let’s unpack this bureaucratic labyrinth. Before the convenor can convene the top six, he must first consult — or rather, convene — his two deputy convenors. From there, the deputy convenors relay the message to the coordinator, who must then convene his two deputy coordinators. Their task? Coordinating the logistics of hosting the top six, who will, in turn, refer their resolution to the full 67-member leadership for a marathon meeting lasting no less than 24 hours.

"I need to reconfigure my life, ANC and MK style."

I couldn’t contain my mirth upon reading the Luthuli House press statement that the reconfiguration (what’s that?) of the ANC provincial executive committees (PECs) in Gauteng and KZN had gone ahead, blending the present with the old guard, veterans if you will. They will govern under adult supervision, like kindergarteners on a school trip — watched, warned, and never fully trusted to cross the street alone.

Dear reader, what’s truly on sale isn’t just news subscriptions or contributions to sustain our beleaguered free press — it is political leadership itself at bargain-bin prices. Buy one, get a whole faction free! Yet, holding power to account can’t be discounted.

The farce, of course, is that Leon fails to see the forest for the trees. The AfriForum-Solidariteit are habitual liars - peddling fairytales as fact with the enthusiasm of modern-day false prophets like Shepherd Bushiri, the self-proclaimed "miracle worker" and fugitive from justice.